


Cyclamens

by DarkColdSummer



Series: Flower You Do-Wing? [3]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: ((in french)), (fun fact my real name means no and yes at the same time), Abuse of Author-ity, Alcohol, Alternate Title: LET COMIC SUFFER, Alternate Universe - Swapfell (Undertale), Alternate Universe - Underfell (Undertale), Alternate Universe - Underswap (Undertale), Anger Management, Author Can English, Author Is Sleep Deprived, Breathing Exercises, By Author, Cheating, Comic (Undertale) Has Issues, Comic (Undertale) is _Sans_ a hug, Comic (Undertale) needs to stop suffering, Depressed Sans (Undertale), Depression, Don't kick people's doors down!, Flower Language, Flowey is that tiny hint of "You IDIOT" in Razz's words, Friendship in the Strangest Places, Gen, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Interrupted Suicide, Interrupted suicide attempt, Is it really a suicide note if it's just a bouquet of flowers?, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Multi, Other, Poor Comic, Poor Sans (Undertale), Progression of Depression, Razz (Swapfell) Swears, Razz no, Red (Underfell) Swears, Running Away, Sans (Undertale) Has Issues, Sans (Undertale) Needs a Hug, Sans (Undertale) Swears, Sans (Undertale)-centric, So tiny, Suicidal Sans, Suicidal Sans (Undertale), Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide, Suicide Attempt, Suicide Notes, Surprising Friendship, Swapfell Sans (Undertale), Swearing, The Author Regrets Everything, The Author Regrets Nothing, Underfell Sans (Undertale), Underswap Sans (Undertale), WELCOME BACK TO YOUR REGULAR DOSAGE OF AUTHOR RAMBLE TAGS, at least that's what literally everyone thinks, breaking up, deteriorating mental state, how ABOUT we IGNORE all THAT and JUST read THIS, i dont think archive warnings apply???, i is stressed, i want to jump off a roof, if you didn't write it, ignore me ples, nautrally, no literally the first paragraph is just the flower meaning of cyclamens, oh wait the additional character/universe tags, okay now stop ranting in the tags, pffthahahahha, spacing out, specifically, summer no, tell me otherwise, that you would miss it, why am i updating the tags at midnight
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-14
Updated: 2019-04-14
Packaged: 2020-01-13 06:29:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,067
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18463385
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarkColdSummer/pseuds/DarkColdSummer
Summary: Here, (not for the first time,) romance takes a backseat, and the constant suffering of one skeleton continues. Aka,Literally everyone except for Razz and Blossom thinks Comic's cheating/about to break up with Blue and Red. They've got it all mish-mashed. The skeleton needs a hug. And for his magic to be restrained to an extent. (Don't look at me like that! It's true. He needs to take care of himself before he does something stupid! - Too late for that.) Aka,Comic stretches, snaps and tries to kill himself. No one is happy about this. Aka,The Author tries her hand at suffering, suffering and more suffering.





	Cyclamens

**Author's Note:**

> Fun fact: I actually essentially completed this ages ago - I only just realised it had a pretty good ending point. Have fun!

_Cyclamens are the flower of deep love. They also are poisonous and have a meaning that relates to death - all good things will eventually come to an end. This flower represents departure and may be a flower used to decorate during funerals._

.

 

They didn't know how it happened.

 

It was a subtle yet somewhat sudden change, and were they not as worried and watchful of him as they were, they might not have noticed the changes.

 

It was little things, like how they couldn't get him to do much. He was there, physically, with them, but it didn't quite seem so mentally. He was falling asleep too often, even for a Sans and especially on their couch, not bothering to join them in their giant bed.

 

There were times when he would just snap at them for the smallest and most trivial of things. There were days and nights where he would come home reeking of alcohol.

Red was convinced he was going to break up with them. Blue wasn't quite too sure.

 

And then there was a sudden period where things were calm. Comic was no longer spending all day in bed, instead walking around with an obviously forced smile, but the duo took it as an improvement compared to before.

 

If they noticed his wings and general appearance were more disheveled than usual, they didn't mention it. (They didn't actually notice, did they? Funny how that one positive change outshone all of the negative ones. The most glaring thing changed, and they relaxed too much, let their guard down. That's what put them all in this situation now, wasn't it? Stars if Blue ever let himself make the same mistake again.)

 

It was a process, fast and slow and too much too quickly and too little too slowly. And, really? Blue and Red only had themselves to blame.

 

Overlooking everything is what led them to this situation after all. The duo facing their counterpart, who was staring down the barrel of a Gaster Blaster.

 

.

 

Maybe they were in denial. 

 

_(“y’know, we haven’t seen comic around lately…” Slim had mentioned, eyes flickering towards Razz, who_ **_visibly hunched in on himself_ ** _?_

 

_They all knew, all of the Sans-es and Papyrus-es, that Razz and Comic were pretty close, though most would have expected their differences to force them apart long ago. Surprisingly, that didn’t happen. The two got along pretty good together, and Red and Blue would definitely know, having been at the receiving end of Razz’s obligatory protective speech when they had decided to date Comic._

 

_The duo might as well have been twins. Well, very different twins, but twins nonetheless. Neither Blossom nor Slim took much offence in that, glad their brothers were getting along nicely._

 

_Red had shrugged. “he hasn’t felt up to much nowadays.”_

 

_Blue had butted in. “Red thinks Coms’s planning to break up with us. That’s… uh… not true, right?”_

 

_They had assumed otherwise of their counterpart, which was completely stupid and unreasonable of them. Comic had been suffering all the while, not saying a word, or even hinting at it, and they had assumed that he was breaking up with them._

 

_‘Cheating on them,’ were the unspoken words that everyone in the room had understood._

 

_Razz had left the room within two minutes of that turn of conversation. Blossom left not too long after that.)_

 

Correction: They had definitely been in denial.

 

But now?

 

With the blank truth right in front of them?

 

There was no reasonable way to deny it.

 

A bitter pill to swallow, of course.

 

But a necessary one.

 

.

 

He was drowning.

 

_(“c’mon kiddo, skeletons can’t drown, we don’t have lungs,” he had told the human once upon a timeline as they tried shoving him into the water in Waterfall.)_

 

Not exactly physically drowning, but it sure felt like it.

 

He heaved and gasped for air, phalanges clawing at his where his non-existent throat would have been, before he found his place again. He was on the couch, as per usual. He dismissed his magical eye and let his white pinpricks pop back to life, slouching on the couch.

 

He was just so, so tired.

 

.

 

The feeling had sunk in. it felt like it had come out of nowhere, sudden and like a slam to the face, but he knew, somewhere deep down, that it’d been sinking in for too long. Everyone had a breaking point after all, and he had just reached his.

 

It didn’t feel like anything big had happened? But there was an ache in his soul that really really hurt and he was just so so tired.

 

He was falling apart.

 

.

 

He forced his magic out, and let it take shape into a blaster, and looked at it, wondering if it could blast on himself. He stroked it as he went deeper into thought.

 

Or maybe he could fly up and drop himself down, though the chances of his wings not reacting instinctively were slim.

 

He contemplated finding a human weapon - a gun maybe? - to kill himself with, but it didn’t feel right.

 

A noose might’ve snapped his neck, but he wasn’t quite sure he was heavy enough for it.

 

Comic looked at the blaster and vanished it.

 

He’d choose another time and date, preferably when his datemates weren’t home.

 

.

 

.

 

It was time.

 

.

 

They were nearly too late.

 

.

 

He laid the white cyclamens on their bed, and placed the lone purple hyacinth on top. A stalk of celosias lay on the left of the cyclamens, and a stalk of delphiniums on the other side. He hoped they would see the apology in the hyacinth, the goodbye in the cyclamens and how he was thinking of them in their favourite flowers.

 

He was slightly glad now that he listened when his brother talked about his newfound passion.

 

.

 

“flowers?”

 

“Hey, a celosia and a delphinium. And… other flowers?”

 

“feel like sending a pic to blossom for help? knowing coms, these flowers will have a certain meaning behind them. and he probably got them from ‘som again.”

 

“Why not?”

 

Before they could do much, Razz kicked their door down.

 

“WHERE THE FUCK IS COMIC?”

 

.

 

“huh?”

 

“ARE YOU TWO ALWAYS THIS SLOW?”

 

“No, but we got the white and purple flowers too. we were about to ask Blossom for help with the meanings.”

 

“DON’T. BOTHER,” Razz took a deep breath and sighed. “Basically, the purple one means sorry. The white one means goodbye. Don’t you see it?”

 

“it’s…” Red mused.

 

“Rather vague,” Blue admitted sheepishly.

 

“You two both know about his depression. We don’t have much time. The flowers are fresh, he’s just put them there. We have to find him before he does anything stupid.”

 

.

 

“coms?” Red broke the silence, eye lights glued to the summoned blaster.

 

His datemate sent the duo a shaky smile back. “…hey…”

 

“coms,” Red interrupted, cutting off whatever Blue was going to say. “please… put the blaster away.”

 

He looked away. “i need you guys to stay calm, alright?”

 

“coms, please.”

 

Comic looked back up, a certain hollowness in his voice as he responded. “j- just… take a step back, close your sockets, and take a deep breath. like… like the breathing exercises you do sometimes, r- red.”

 

“If,” Blue said, voice shaking. “We do close our sockets. When… When we open them again, will you still be here?”

 

Comic closed his sockets and grimaced, but didn’t respond, guilt written on his face. His wings were sagged, lying at his sides, limp and lifeless. Blue wondered how both he and Red had missed all of the signs.

 

Blue rubbed away the tears that threatened to spill. “Please Coms, please just- just- just put it away! Please, Comic!”

 

“just… leave. you…” Comic looked away, having opened his sockets. “you shouldn’t have to see this.”

 

No one moved.

 

There was a wry smile on his face. “don’t say i didn’t warn you.”

 

He snapped his phalanges, and the blaster charged up energy to blast. “i’m so sorry…”

 

“no!” Red, as he prepared to teleport. “No!” Blue, as he leapt forward. “FUCK NO!” Razz. “DON’T YOU FUCKING DARE!” Still Razz. Wait. Where did he come from?

 

The blaster shot out the concentrated energy in a stream of white.

 

.

 

Comic was slammed against the wall by blue magic, the energy barely nicking his jacket. Whoever used it was evidently very well versed in using it.

 

“Vanish the blaster.” Razz’s voice was cold and to the point, but upon closer observation, his wings were trembling, arm outstretched, blue magic holding his counterpart in place.

 

There was a shake of his head - Comic couldn’t trust his voice to say the right things.

 

Razz watched his counterpart carefully, then summoned his own blaster to blast the other’s blaster to pieces. He put his larger blaster back into the void.

 

“…why did you stop me?”

 

“What.” There was a final note to Razz’s voice, curt and scared at the same time. “Why did we-? You- You IDIOT.”

 

Comic flinched. Blue glared. Red looked away. Razz winced, realising what he’d just said.

 

“You’re the first person I’ve ever considered a friend!” Razz looked away, flushed a dark blue. “Back in Swapfell, friends didn’t exist. The closest to one I had was my Grillby. Then the barrier broke and everything, and then I met you guys, and Comic, you were the first friend I’ve ever had. How could you think that it wouldn’t tear me apart to lose you? You- You promised!” The last word came out near a scream.

 

“razz-“

 

“No! You don’t get to talk right now!” His fist clenched and unclenched repeatedly. “How about Blossom? He’s your brother! Can’t you imagine how devastated he would be if he lost his only brother?”

 

“he’s got slim.”

 

“What did I just say? No talking! And it’s not the same! Slim’s his boyfriend, not his brother! It’s not the same! And how about Red and Blue?!” The two mentioned shifted uncomfortably. “How do you think they would feel?”

 

“…” Comic evidently had a retort to Razz’s rhetorical question, but stayed silent, as per request.

 

“i was terrified,” Red admitted, and his boyfriends looked at him. Razz kept watching Comic, worry written all over his skull. Red took a step forward, arm reached out. Comic inched away. Blue put a hand on his Underfell counterpart, who looked a little hurt by the rejection. “i still am tibia honest. i-” He swallowed. “i thought we were gonna lose you coms. i didn’t think razz was gonna stop you in time. i- i thought-” Red tears streamed down Red’s face, his eye lights wild and frenzied as he watched his boyfriend. “i thought we were gonna have to see you dust in front of us coms!”

 

Comic looked away. Red hurriedly wiped his tears away using the back of his jacket sleeve and sniffed pathetically.

 

“’ts fuckin’ terrifyin’ coms,” Red whispered, voice choked. Blue rubbed his boyfriend’s shoulder gently.

 

“Comic…” Blue whispered. “Why didn’t you tell us you were feeling this way? We… we could have helped… One way or another… It would take time but eventually it would have worked out…”

 

“i…” Comic backed away. “i didn’t want to bother you. you’d- you’d get over my death eventually. i don’t matter in the long run. i- i’m not important. i’m…” He looked away. “…not… important…”

 

Razz took large steps forward, and grabbed his friend by the shoulders, shaking them hard. “Look at me.”

 

Comic firmly kept his head turned away. Razz rolled his eyes and grabbed Comic’s skull, forcing it to face him. Comic’s eye lights darted to a side. “Look at me, Sans.”

 

Eye lights glanced briefly at him before darting away, and Razz sighed, knowing it was the best he would get. “If you won’t look at me, look at your datemates at least. Just… Look at them, closely. Red is crying, Comic. Have you ever seen him cry before? Blue is shaking. He’s terrified. You know we Sanses don’t scare easily. You’re important to them. They wouldn’t get over your death. _We_ wouldn’t get over your death.”   
  
“Open your eyes Comic, you matter. You’re important. You’re important to us Coms… Please… Remember that.”

 

Comic stared at all three of them. Razz shifted uncomfortably under his counterpart’s empty gaze. Red and Blue looked away.

 

It took a few more seconds than it should have, but Comic did what he did best - running away.

**Author's Note:**

> KK so you made it to the end, yay! Time for the typical stuff.  
> My Tumblr's the same username as my Ao3, pop by for random art stuff and all that happy nonsense.
> 
> This is part of a series I think. I'm still working on the part where classiccherryberry actually gets together (Celosias and Delphiniums) but once that's done (which should be within the next 2-3 chapters), I think the whole thing will just be updated as a series. Evidently, this one-shot doesn't seem very... complete. And that's it for the updates on the writing status of this series.


End file.
